How Can I Not Be Amongst You?

Death has been creeping around my door
a little too often for my liking lately.
I've had 3 beloveds die in two years.
I've experienced death and loss before but
never so close together.
This of course is shaking my world up in a big way.
You see..how can I put this...
I don't want to die and if I'm even more honest will you,
I need to say that up until recently,I didn't think it could
really happen to me.
Of course I know that's impossible!
The thinking rational part of me knows this.
It's the other part of me,the inside,my spirit,my heart
my soul that doesn't want to believe it. Can't believe it
and so I sit here and don't!
Every time somebody dies that belief is shaken and it gets worse
when it's a loved one who goes. If it could happen to them then surely
it could happen to...me. I'm going to die.

I hate that! I do not want to!
I have way too many things to do and I LIKE LIVING!
I don't know how people ever get their heads around this
and yet I know they do.

My father in law for example.
Dad had a massive heart attack four years
ago. It wasn't his first we later found out.
He'd had at least 3 big ones before that he iggnored
(how do you iggnore a fricking heart attack?
We think he had them when he had 3 single car
accidents that totaled,3 cars.
He didn't go to the doctor to see why he
was driving off the road!)
but regardless he was still alive and very,very lucky.
He had bypass surgery and for a while there took it
easy but then slowly slipped back into his old ways.
When people expressed their concern he'd get pissed and mad
at them and so gradually people just stopped and let him live
the way he wanted too.
Last year he went into a bit of a depression and while we all
wondered about it we didn't know what was wrong and just
let him be. Chalk it up to old age,he was 70.
He was allowed to be grumpy and depressed at times.
Looking back now though I have to wonder if he was struggling
with this very thing. Struggling as he realized he was going to die
and there was not one damn thing he could do to stop
it. The answer wasn't in eating right and exercising.
He couldn't make it stop by taking his insulin or heart meds.
Nothing was going to change the fact that he was going to die,possibly soon.
Of course I could be wrong but I do find it interesting that the
man now seems to have an
entirely new appreciation for life and living well.
He's taking better care of himself and he's tidying up loose ends
so to speak.
Talking about his memories of the kids as wee ones
,showing the kids some of his treasures
(treasures his own kids have never seen) and telling them
he wants them to have them 'when he goes'. He's super affectionate
and is always asking for us to visit,inviting the kids down
'whenever they want'. He's always enjoyed them but
never quite this much. Devon says he talks about his death
all the time when they're alone together working nights at the mill
and I've noticed he talks about his childhood more and more.
Mum says he's been talking about what he thinks she should do
when he dies and when we buy him stuff or make
a fuss over him,he scolds us and says he doesn't need stuff anymore,
that we should save our money for ourselves..
He talks about things that have hurt him or angered him more openly
and while he's not trying to make peace with anybody or a particular
situation, he's stating for the record,his true feelings about things he never
would have before.
It's creepy and fascinating all at the same time.
I kind of feel that not only is he preparing himself for the end
but that he's trying to prepare us too.
What a dear sweet man.

I still don't want to die and I certainly don't want
Dad to die either but it's coming.
There's nothing any of us can do about that,
except live well,every day.
I only hope if I'm lucky enough to last that long
that I'll handle the coming of my end
with as much,love,grace and dignity as Dad is.
I tend to think though that I'm going to go,
kicking and screaming. Fighting all the way,lol
How about you?

Things I've learned this weekend.

I have zero will power when it comes to Monsters Pizza,the BEST
pizza I've ever,ever,ever,ever,EVER tasted. None what so ever.
I'm not even going to try to avoid it from now on.

Devon looks damn handsome in his new glasses AND seems to like
them. He's kept them on the entire weekend and cleans them
obsessvely.It's pretty cute. I thought he only needed them for
seeing distance,but no. He needs to wear them all the time.
He seems ok about that.

Dipped cones from Dairy Queen are really good too.
Even in Winter!

There are not a lot of places in this little valley that get full
sun in the Winter. Dur and I drove around(eating our cones)
checking out areas we hadn't seen before when we discovered this.
SO,if we buy a house here,we're not going to have too many choices.


One of Durell's co-workers came to him about the car. He wants to buy it.
We've decided to say Yes to that,and if everything works out, we'll be paying
off the car loan sooner than expected AND getting the truck on the road.
We'll also be able to save up for an older car,you know for road trips when
we don't want to spend our life's saving on fuel.

Speaking of road trips, hotels in Jasper and well hotels in general
are really fucking expensive. If I wasn't so afraid of being eaten by
a grizzly bear,I'd say camp outside,but that's not an option. Besides
Dur would never go for that,he HATES camping.
It pains me to pay 143 buckeroos for one night in a crappy hotel
room. That was the cheapest I found,waaaa!

The house I'm in is indeed sliding down the hill as is
apparent by the big gaps along the ceiling,where it
meets the wall that are getting worse as each day goes by.
The home inspector told my landlords this and they poo-pooed
him,making out like he didn't know what he was talking about.
It cost them the sale of this house,a house they tried to sell to us
beforehand,all the while working really hard to convince
us we didn't need a home inspector. Yeah...right.
Sure glad we listened to our intincts!
I can't WAIT til they see the evidence. Muwaahaahaahaahaa
Petty yes,but I don't care!

It's ok to leave the laundry 'til Monday,just hours before
your husband needs his work clothes. It's A-Ok as long
as you don't get caught up writing a post and forget ALLL
about it. Heh,better go! Happy Monday

Auntie Cass' s Kitchen-Chicken Loaf with Mushroom Sauce

Chicken Loaf with Mushroom Sauce
3 cups diced cooked chicken
2 cups fine soft bread crumbs
1 cup cooked rice
2 tsp chicken seasoning(I'm assuming this means poultry seasoning)
4 eggs
1 1/2 cups chicken broth or milk
Mix chicken,crumbs,rice and seasoning.
Beat eggs slightly and combine with broth
(or milk). Add to meat mixture,mix well.
Pack in a loaf pan you've lined with parchment paper.
Bake at 325 degrees until firm.
Sauce
3 tbsp butter
1 can mushrooms,diluted-duh I mean DRAINED(i,myself would use fresh)
3 tbsp brown flour(does this mean whole wheat? Auntie Cass?
Anybody? It must. Use whatever you have on hand)
salt and pepper
1/2 cup chicken broth
1/2 cup water
dash worcestershire sauce
melt butter,add mushrooms,flour and seasonings.
Mix and add stock and water gradually. Stir and cook
until thickened. Pour over hot loaf and serve.

Another week of January done and gone!
It's good to see the weekend,I feel like being lazy
but we have to go out today to get Devon glasses.
He's going to be a four eyes like me! Right now
it's just for tv and the like but that's how I started
and now I wear mine full time. Ha Ha Ha
I won't tell the kid that though. He's already
freaked that he'll have to wear them while driving..
you know 3 years from now. Talk about seeing into
the future. Or NOT as the case may be.

Have a great weekend All!

The First Stop

on our family vacation this summer
is going to be Mt.Robson Park.
I've been going like a mad woman
planning and researching and thought
I'd share what I've found here with you!
Isn't it gorgeous?
I'm sure you'll see a similar photo here
on our return,but I suspect mine will have
children a-top the sign,ha!
Check out these links...
BC Parks-Mt.Robson
Mt.Robson-Wikipedia

Random Photos

Ciari with orange hair(wash out dye) She looks just like my sister here,it's kind of freaky actually!

My new shoes

Cat school!

Hard at work in a mess. Corny was kicked off shortly after this photo was taken because he kept attacking her pencil.

These last ones are from the Polar Bear Swim.
The band,notice the Converse All-Stars?

The hole. It was a balmy -15 that day and the wind was fierce and bone chilling.

Freaks

Catch up meme

It's a catch up meme to me,because I've been meaning
to do this one(and others) since the begining of
the month!
I got this from
Kamrin

1. Have you ever been searched by the cops?
Oh yeah!

2. Do you close your eyes on roller coasters?
Nope. How are you supposed to see the world flash by?
I love Coasters,even if they make me sick now.

3. When’s the last time you’ve been sledding?
14-15 years ago. I could do it now of course but it looks
slightly more dangerous and less fun somehow.

4. Would you rather sleep with someone else, or alone?
It all depends. Sometimes I want to cuddle up,other times
I want the bed ALLLLL to myself.

5. Do you believe in ghosts?
I do! But I don't call them ghosts and don't
consider them supernatural or weird.

6. Do you consider yourself creative?
At times.

7. Do you think O.J. killed his wife?
Hell yes! Do you know that a long time
ago,I used to judge people by this question?
If they thought he was innocent,I avoided
them like the plague AND totally admit now to
thinking less of them.
That used to infuriate me. Inncocent.
Yeah right. How can you people be so BLIND?
lol
I've since lightened up;)

9. Do you stay friends with your ex’s?
Noooo,never,ever,ever. They are ex's for a reason!

10. Do you know how to play poker?
Kind of. It doesnt really interest me.

11. Have you ever been awake for 48 hours straight?
Yeppers!

12. If you’re driving in the middle of the night, and no one is around do you run red lights?
I don't drive so no BUT I have encouraged Durell to do so(he always tells
me to bugger off) so take that as you will.
13. Do you have a secret that no one knows but you?
I do. Right now I'm sitting on a really big one(well,big to me)
I can't wait to put it into motion,then blab about it,lol
14. Boston Red Sox or New York Yankees?
Neither!
15. Have you ever been Ice Skating?
I have. I'm a little wobbley!
16. How often do you remember your dreams?
All the time! My last few have been disturbing.
In one,Dur shot himself in the head right in front
of me,on Christmas Eve.
Carolyn ,you were in that
one. I ran to use the phone(we didn't pay the bill apparently,because
mine was dead) and you showed up at the sandwich shop
to lend support. That dream scared me,because it felt so real.
Then I dreamed of my parents,twice. Not even gonna touch those ones,lol
And the last one was a dream about Beans. I was taking her for a walk at
Lougheed Mall(the mall of my youth) and I dropped her leash for one second
and she disappeared..never to be seen again.
Gee? I wonder what THAT ONE means? HAHAHA
Oy.
17. When was the last time you laughed so hard you cried?
I can't remember,but I know it was recently.
18. Can you name 5 songs by The Beatles?
Oh here I go,pissing off Beatles fans everywhere.
I can,but I don't care to because,I hate The Beatles.
Sorry.
19. What’s the one thing on your mind now?
Can I have two? My secret going ons AND
my personal development. I'm making new
discoveries about myself and my life,that
are leading me down interesting paths.
20. Do you know who Ghetto-ass barbie is?
Sure do. I'm hoping for a Trailer Trash Barbie
to go with my lifestyle.
21. What cell service do you use?
I don't use a cell phone!
Am I the last person on this side of the
world who doesn't?
I don't need one.
Besides,I could stand at one end of town and yell,
and whom ever I was calling would hear and be able to respond.
Either that or the rumour mill would take a message for me.
22. Do you like Sushi?
I've had slices of California Roll,but don't consider
that Sushi. When we go to Tofino next,Ciari and I
are going to go all out,and try as much as we can,
then I'll know if I like it or not.
23. Have you ever narrowly avoided a fatal accident?
Yes,a couple of times. Train accident,car accidents.
Some of them haven't been accidents. Like all the times
I narrowly escaped being kidnapped(as a kid and a teen)
beat up,mugged ect ect.
24. What do you wear to bed?
In the winter,a bra and socks. Pjs if it's really cold.
In the summer,a bra.
I am noticing though as I get older and the boobs lose
their..boobness,the bra is less comfortable and I end up
taking it off. I got into the habit of wearing it because I
thought it'd keep my breasts firm...yeah..didn't work.
25. Been caught stealing?
Yep. One time,and one time only(been caught that is)
Being arrested sure cured me!
26. Do you truly hate anyone?
Hate,as in a burning,all consuming rage with
a desire to kill? No.
Hate,as in have no use for,never want to
be in their company,don't like who they are,
as human beings? Yes.
27. Have you sung in front of the mirror?
Haa,all the time! My friend Bridgette and I
used to DANCE and sing in front of the big
mirror at her Aunt's house. We were SO
cool.
28. What food do you find disgusting?
Innards and the like.
29. Do you sing in the shower?
Sometimes,mostly I talk to myself.
Yes,I answer back!
30. Have you ever stood up for someone you hardly knew?
Always! Not only people but animals too.
I once sprayed a group of asshole kids with my hose
who were killing bugs with a magnifying glass.
"Oooops,I'm sorry! Did I get you???"
31. Have you ever been punched in the face?
For sure. The best time was when my brother in
law was goofing around and accidently punched me in the head.
(very lightly) in a bar.
The bouncer saw it,flew over in a RAGE and kicked him out.
HA! Mess with ME,will ya??

Unconscious Mutterings

I haven't done this in awhile!
Click the title above to check it out:)
Week 207

1. Audition :: Embarrasment. I once went to an audition as support for a friend. We were in our teens.She read and was horrible. I felt so bad for her. Acting and singing were her life. How we became friends I'll NEVER know,lol. We were SO different.It sure sucked to watch her do so badly,then BEG them to give her another chance,ugh.
   ANYways,to top it all off they tried really,really hard to get me to read. I refused.They tried harder. I refused harder. This went on and on until finally I just left. What part of NO don't you understand people,lol I am NOT an actress.
   The whole experience was awful and uncomfortable.
   


2. Urgent ::
Ohh that Foreigner song,lol. I loved Foreigner.
I used to play that cassette over and over again as a kid.

3. Lunch ::
Mmmm,lunch. I like lunch. On today's menu,dinner from last night. Spanish Pasta.

4. Adult ::
Not me. But I'm working on it.One day the brain may catch up with the body.

5. Mug ::
Missing! Durell bought me this beautiful square,red mug for Christmas and I can't find it ANYWHERE. I have a feeling,Miss Thing has it in her room,or she broke it,then hucked it out without telling me. I hope I'm wrong though. It would suck to live with that guilt plus I want my mug back,maybe it's in a cupboard somewhere,being used to hold cinnamon sugar..

6. Awful ::
2006

7. Comics ::
Pretty coloured paper.

8. Damage ::
The wall in Jig's room. She put a knee sized hole in her wall. Ugh. Apparently,she tripped over her pjs,falling into the wall. It is possible,this is the same child who ran into a plate glass window while racing to it to see what the dog was barking at. Lucky for her it didn't break and she only got a cut under her chin. A cut that requirred stitches. As Ciari said "I can see my meat" lol

9. Kicks ::
High kicks,like the Can-Can Dancers do at Golden Spike Days,in Port Moody. I always wanted to be a Can-Can Dancer. They get to wear pretty costumes and twirl and dance and show their bums when they bend over,lol. I always tease Durell that if *I* was a Can-Can dancer,I'd wear a thong instead of granny panties. You know,stir things up a bit;p

10. Experience ::
The Durell Hislastname Experience. Devon came up with that dorky name for a band,should Durell ever create one,lol. We're thinking we may make him a shirt for Father's Day,with concert dates and everything,just to be big pain in the asses hehehehehehe.

Today is the first day of the Robert Willy Picton's murder trial,here in BC.
He's been charged with 26 counts of first degree murder,and is being tried
on six of them today.
Sereena Abotsway, Mona Wilson, Andrea Joesbury, Georgina Papin, Brenda Wolfe and Marnie Frey.
Please keep these women in your thoughts and hearts today as things get under way and pray or send good vibes out to their families and loved ones.
You can read about the trial and victims,here

Oh GRR!

I tried to post that Eminen video days ago!
That damn song is stuck in my head,ahhhh!
Well it didn't show up and then my computer
started acting up so I wrote a post saying just that
then took a little vacation to fix my computer and
take a blogging break,only to come back and find
not one but TWO Eminem videos here!
lol
Youtube.com and blogger seem to have a mind of their
own.

ANYways,how are you all doing?
We have tons of snow but it's warm out,sunny today too.
The kids and I have been having fun,listening to the truckers
on the scanner like dorks and playing outside.
I'm not doing much,cleaning my house,going to the library,
Sooo exciting,heh.
I am wearing a brand new pair of shoes though.
Yeeehaa for that! They're for summer but I want to
break them in a bit. I'll take a pic of them later.
They're not something I'd have bought before but
I'm likin' them lots.
Oh! And my brother in law and sister in law have set
a date for their wedding. I'm pretty excited about that!
I talked to my sis in law last night for a bit about all her
plans. Her excitement is contagious and we had
a good talk. That's the first time we've ever talked on the
phone. I like her more and more,every time we chat.
We're a lot alike,and she's so easy going and fun.
That weird ackwardness is gone AND I didn't say anything
stupid,lol. A success!

Can you believe it's the 20th of January already?
I know winter just started but I also know that before too
long(Feb1 to be exact) the sun is going to start shining in
the yard again.
Then the snow's going to melt and we'll be firming up our plans to move
off Crazy Street,into a new house.
A new house with a new yard,a new view,
new neighbors,new pets to meet and steal,hahaha.
Do you have any major plans for this Spring?

Eminem You Don't Know

Eminem You Don't Know

Computer Problems

ACK!
As soon as I get them fixed I'll be back.
Keep your fingers crossed that I can fix em myself!

I'm all "A Flutter"

Through the course of a conversation
about depression,of all things,Durell
told me that he's taking a week off
this summer,regardless of money,
his job,etc etc.
I said "Ooooooh we can go somewhere!"
and he said sure. YAY!
A real vacation!
My hubby has only ever taken one week off,once
in our whole togetherness. Once.

My first thought was a trip to Tofino,of course.
Dur said he'd be in to that but then I said
Nope,instead of me hijacking everything
why don't you decide...and he wants to do
a bit of a tour of the northern part of our
province AND Alberta. The province to the
left of us.
We're going to go to Mt.Robson(the park and the
mountain) where the headwaters of the Fraser River
are AND where the highest peak in the Rockies lie.
Then on to Jasper,where I've been as a kid(I wonder
if that mountain will still look as impressive?) then
we'll rest up in Hinton,and drive on to Edmonton.
We're going to stay in Edmonton for a couple of days,
then will head back home via Grande Prarie,where we'll
stay for a day,then on to Dawson Creek(we'll stay a day
there too) and then home.

I'm SO excited!
We're visiting so many of the places
I've always wanted to visit,in one full
swoop! Not to mention,I love road trips.
I love the planning that goes into them,
and the list writing,the packing,learning new
tips and tricks and researching new places in
great detail. I've got tons of time to do
all of this,we're not going til Summer.
How am I ever going to wait out the next
six or seven months? Hee!

Yeah..edited to add: Alberta is the province to the RIGHT of
mine,lmao,not the left!
To the left is the Pacific and oh..Japan!
Geesh,don't let ME give directions,ha!

We're being stalked by a five year old

He calls hourly for Ciari(why oh why did I ever authorize that
number exchange?) here from 1pm on and when
there is no answer(thank you call display)
he calls,and calls and calls again.
He leaves long rambling messages on the machine
and is always trying to convince me to let his
mum(who I don't know at all) take Ciari swimming
or over to their house to play. This is after Ciari
has already asked me and I've said no.
Uh kid? What makes you think you're going to
be able to convince me otherwise?lol
I think he's got a bit of the ADHD.
He reminds me of Ciari in her early years
and I've seen other indicators of it,but hey
I'm not a doctor so who am I to say.
All I know is that this kid makes me thankful
for the daughter I have. She's a calm serene
child compared to him. Hahahaha

I got after him the other day because he wandered
up to our house,opened my door and walked in!
Ciari was playing in the yard and he didn't say two words
to her,just walked in to talk to me! AHHH!
Can you imagine if I was on the CAN like the
Naked Boobie Star??
LOL the poor child would have been
scarred for LIFE!
He's not a bad kid by any means. He plays nicely
with Jig and he's pretty darn advanced for his
age. Wow is he ever smart! Not your
average five year old. He's very kind and he
loves animals,something that always warms me right up
to a person.
He's funny and cute and eager(ok too fucking eager)
but he's a good little guy.
OH but he's driving me INSANE!

I have no intention of ever letting Jig go anywhere with him
because I don't know his parents. I know people do it all the time
but hell I worry and freak when she goes with people I know,never
mind people I don't,lol. I learned that lesson the hard way. People
under-estimate her (or over-estimate themselves)
and she's almost died(twice) because of it.
I won't be making that mistake again!
His mum came and introduced herself to me and said she would be
inviting Jig to do stuff with them and that she thought I'd like to
meet her,which was nice but hey lady,one meeting does not a
relationship make. And the whole conversation was kind of weird.
She was the one doing all the talking and planning,while I stood there
saying nothing. Partly because I couldn't get a word in edgewise
(she's like her son)
and partly because..well..because frankly I'm just
not that interested. Ya know?
That kid wears me out,I can't imagine seeing
him more often then I already do.
The couple of days a week,when he's at his baby sitters,are more than
enough for me!
And if his mum is the same....well I'd be in even more of a mess,wouldn't I?

Of course,it's not about me.
Ciari likes him and sure she'd like
to do stuff with him,but my rule about knowing parents
is just not negotiable.
I'm hoping they'll just drift off into the sunset.
I reeeeally don't want to have to explain why
I keep saying no. People never take that well.
Oh wait,I already told the kid my rule..that must
have prompted the mum's introduction..why do people
think you're going to change your mind so easily?

I feel mean..he's five..but ohhhh I just can't take him.
He's waaay to intense for me.
Part of me says-Stop being such a grump,suck it up and
make an effort for your daughter-but the other part of me,the
part that's done that before with ill results says-RUN-.
A person has to know their limits and I think,trust their feelings.

All I know,is that the world had better be prepared for when
this little guy grows up! He is going to set things on their head,lol

What? Do I live in a deep freeze??

Do they still call freezers that?
I'm a bit out of the loop.

When Devon woke up at 6:45 we were at -36C(-33F).
We were tied with Deese Lake
( a community near our border with ALASKA)
for coldest spot in the province.
What the HELL are we doing with the same temperature
as a city that far NORTH!?
We're in the SOUTHERN Interior.
I'm confused..and cold.
Ha.
It's -29C (-20F) now. Warming up!
Time to get the shorts out.

Apparently,it's National De-Lurking Week.
You know what that means..if you stop by
to read me but never say Hi,please take this
moment to do so.
I'd love to meet you!

That wheat salad thingy turned out pretty good.
Even the kids liked it so that's saying something
Here's the 'recipe'
Wheat Berry Salad
2 cups wheat seeds or berries,cooked as per directions
a couple of green onion,sliced
2 carrots,grated
1 package frozen spinach,thawed,and squeezed dry
couple of cloves of garlic,pressed. ( I used 6,but you may
like your family members and society more than I do)
1 can chick peas,drained and rinsed
zest of one lemon
juice of one lemon
salt
pepper
Drain the wheat seeds,then mix with everything else and chill.
I've had this every day for lunch this week,it was pretty addicting
and I had problems keeping out of the bowl between meals;p

The first snow storm of 2007

knocked out our phone
and internet yesterday.
Booo to that!
I was like a crazy woman trying to get online
ha,but still it was nice to sit and read books all day.
We got a lot of snow but I don't think it did any damage.
Not like the weather they've been getting on the Coast.

The lower mainland has been hit so hard this fall and winter
season,that one of our most treasured parks has suffered
some major damage. Downed trees,mudslides,crumbling
sea walls..and so on and so on.
It's going to cost so much moola to fix it all up that a
local news station has taken it upon
themselves to do a bit of fundraising to help restore it
to it's former glory. A local businessman has offered
to match the money they raise and so far they're up
to 1 million total.
That's pretty amazing,isn't it?!
I think they estimated they'd need 4-5 million total to complete
the job.
Poor park:(
I grew up going to Stanley Park.
It was always a major event to spend the day there.
We'd walk around the sea wall,play on the beaches,enjoy the many
playgrounds. We'd visit the petting zoo and take a ride on the train.
We'd enjoy fish and chips with seagulls flying about bugging us for food,lol
Stanley Park is where I was almost ATTACKED by a gang of rowdy squirrels
(I was SO asking for it) and had many wonderful,enlightening experiences
with animals housed in the zoo(now phased out) and aquarium.
It was a huge part of my childhood. I think it was a huge
part of everybody's childhood here.
I'm sure every kid in the lower mainland has spent at least one day
there on a school field trip,running loose with zero supervision,lol
Good times...good times.

I'll leave you now with a link to my park in all it's beautiful glory.
I just know it'll look this way again!
Stanley Park

It's a good thing

payday was Friday because our coffee pot
died on us,AGAIN.
Anbody who knows me,knows I neeeeed
my coffee badly!
Dur's gone to buy a new one.
Lucky for the family it died after we'd had our first cup.
Everything seems to be dying on us.
Our microwave went too!
Now we have a pretty stainless steel
one though,so all is well;P
Ha,well all except our bank account.
Why do these things go all at once?

How was your weekend?
Ours was filled with shopping,the library(where I got
a zillion good books) and ohh...just fiddling around town.
It was so warm here. It felt like Spring!

I picked up a rooster shaped kitchen timer,
(It's adorable and I sense a collection about to start.
Timers,not roosters)
and a new exercise ball,after Corny managed
to POP the one he was photographed on last week,Grrr.
I blew it up today and he was already eyeing it up.
We picked up a coconut too,and the kids got their
first taste of a fresh one. YUM! We'll be doing that again.
We enjoyed it just the way it was but imagine fresh coconut
in a pie or cake?? Mmmmhmmm,I can taste it already.

Today I'm cleaning up and doing school with the kids.
I'm making a new dish with wheat seeds
(are they the same as wheat berries? I've never had either!)
and chick peas,veggies and stuff. I hope it turns out
good. Ha,I'll be eating it for lunch this entire
week! If it does I'll post the recipe.

Ok,I've got to go for lunch.
Thanks for your comments yesterday.
I'm coming back to respond as soon
as I'm done stuffing my face!

Beaners' Day

It's been one month since my sweet girl died on my
kitchen floor. No,no don't feel sad for me. This is
going to be a positive post!

It's so true what you all said,time heals.
While I miss her,I don't feel any of the pain
I felt in the hours,days and weeks after her death.
Going to the Coast and the Aerosmith concert
really helped snap me out of that mind frame
and gradually I came to the place I am now.
Happy to have known her and have had her
in my life.

I'd even say life is easier without a dog.
I didn't says Beans,lol,I said a dog.
They really take up a lot of time and energy
and ya know it's nice to go out and not have
to worry about what we're going to do with her
while we're gone. Kennel? Cram her into the car?
Leave her at home...alone??
It's really nice to not listen to her bark
every.single.time another dog on our
street starts yapping. Something that
happened every ...oh 25 seconds!
Of course there are lots of things we miss.
Her,being the main one.
The others being,
sleeping with her,smelling her doggy smell,
that happy face and waggy tail that never,ever
failed to greet us. The instant floor cleaner upper
whenever we dropped food and didn't want to
clean it up,and having no one to blame farts on.
Hee Hee


It's come to the point now though where we're able
to remember ALL the good and forget about the bad.
I no longer go into my room in private to smell the
inside of her collar,nor do I stand on the spot on the
floor where she died,and try to feel her there.
I don't think about that day very often,except to remember
that she died on the 7th and that 7 is my lucky number.
I think about how her ID number at the pound was 14.
She was my lucky number,twice!
I was inspired by this and decided to do something
more for my animal friends.

Every month on the 7th,we're going to buy something
to donate to our local shelter. Then next year on Dec.7th
we'll gather it all up and donate it,in Beans name.
AND every month on the 7th here,I'm going to write
an animal inspired post,for as long as I come up
with ideas. Today being the first of hopefully,many,
interesting posts.
Happy Beans Day!
I'll leave you with some photos:)

Beans on the day she died. The difference in her
appearance is pretty shocking,isn't it?
I'm glad I took this photo. It helped confirm
that I made the right decision to have her euthanized.






Beaners,this past fall

Pretty Pup

Happy Goofy Girl

Auntie Cass's Kitchen-Pot Roast

I've made this one and it's an old fashioned homey
meal.
Not only does it have onion soup mix in it,but it also has
the famous canned mushroom soup. Woohoo!
I used to add that to everything,lol.
While I've since evolved from that sort of cooking,
every once in awhile I find I'm craving a taste.
Here's a simple recipe in case you crave it too!

Pot Roast in Foil
4lbs beef chuck roast
1 env onion soup mix
1-10oz can condensed cream of mushroom soup
Place a 30x18in piece of heavy duty foil
in a 13x9in baking pan. Place meat on top.
Sprinkle on soup mix and spread with
mushroom soup. Fold foil over
and seal securely.
Cook at 350 degrees for 4 hours.

What's more important?

Last night the CBC aired a two hour special called
The Greatest Canadian Invention.
They had compiled a list of 50 Canadian inventions
(some of which other countries also lay claim to,but
whatever,they're still rightfully ours,heh. It all depends
on your definition of ownership,lol)
and invited people to vote on which was the greatest
via this website here.
Some of the choices were:
The caulking gun
Cobalt-60 "Bomb" cancer treatment
Light bulb
Poutine(fries,gravy and cheese curds)
Electric oven
Zipper
Insulin
The Wonderbra
UV degradable plastics
Telephone
Pablum
Electric Wheelchair
Java Programming Language
Blackberry
Alkaline Long Life Battery
Pacemaker
and so on and so on.
It was no surprise that Insulin,invented by Drs.
Frederick Banting and Charles Best,was hailed
as the Greatest Canadian Invention.
Insulin helps keep my parents in law alive
AND kept Jiggy and I safe throughout
my pregnancy with her.
What did I vote for when I first learned of this??
Poutine.
Yep,it's all about the food for me!

We did end up in the ER last night.
When we got to the clinic at 5pm on the dot
there was already a packed room full of people
ahead of us. I was evesdropping on the woman
in front of us who was talking to the receptionist
and learned that the doctor hadn't even arrived yet.
The wait was going to be horrendous and she said she
was going to try again tomorrow.
When she told the clerk this,the clerk suggested the
ER because UTIs should be seen right away.
That helped me make up MY mind,lol.
If she was going to the ER for a UTI then
we were too!
It turned out to be faster there (! Shocking I know)
and much more pleasant. Sure we had to wait a bit
but in a roomy waiting room with toys and other kids.
Not in a cramped hallway with 9 billion sniffling miserable
sick people,screaming children and not enough floor space
to sit on, never mind chairs.
I don't call it the walk-in clinic from hell for nothing!

Ciari's urine was almost clear (except for blood) and at
first the doctor wasn't going to prescribe anything. I was ticked,not
at him. I'm not keen on the over use of anti-biotics either,just
at the situation. How could her urine be "fine" when there
was blood in it AND she was in pain?? It seemed weird.
Stupid test.
But he gave me the prescription anyhow because of her
past history and symptoms. Something about white blood
cells not showing up or showing up...I don't
know. He's doing a culture and will call me if she needs more.
This run is only a three dayer.
He wanted to check her 'down there' for irritation on the surface
and Ciari refused him. He looked at me like-I need your help here
Mum-and I suggested that *I* check.
He was a little put out at first I think,but agreeable none the less.
He was really very gentle and patient with her and the other kids.
(Evesdropping again)
I had to laugh though because, he told me where to look.
Yeah...I know..I have one myself!
She was fine as expected and so he gave us the prescription
afterall.
It is a little scary to think that blood in your urine isn't a screaming
indicator of something serious. I asked him about that and he acted like
I was so naive. Well sorry,I must have left my MEDICAL DEGREE in my
other purse!

Doctors,can't live without them,can't punch them in the head when they're
acting like arseholes.
At any rate the whole thing was better than the alternative and I'm happy
there's at least one doctor who's decided to work here and not move to greener
pastures like all the others. Just a fact of life in a small town though:)

Happy Thursday!

Make a Mum Happy

A while back Cori wrote an excellent and honest post about a subject
a lot of us Mums can relate to. In her post she included a link for
this site here where on this page you can find a program designed to
help us Mums feel happier.
While I'm feeling pretty darn happy at the moment,I thought
I'd give it a whirl. It never hurts to have extra in the reserve
fund! Plus,it's fun to do something other than laundry and school work
every day! Something just for Moi.
Of course it also provides material for blog posts other than ramblings
about animals and weather,hahahaha,so from time to time I'll include
part of the exercises here;p
Thank you Cori for your post and site info!

Ten things I like about myself.
1.I'm naturally cheerful and merry most of the time.
2.I have nice legs.
3.I'm an adventurous cook.
4. I'm an animal lover and,animals love me right back.
5.I take care of my body by exercising. Even
on the days when I don't want to!
6. I love the Earth and do the best I can
to take care of Her.
7. I am soft hearted.
8. I am a good Mum.
9.I'm open-minded.
10.I am courageous.

Ten good things I have in my life.
1. My husband,kids and family who love me.
2. My pets and various other animals who love me.
3.My blog and blogger buddies.
4. A roof over my head.
5. My computer. This wonderful instrument that allows
me easy access to information and interesting people.
People whom I'd never have the opportunity to meet
otherwise.
6. Food in my belly.
7.Books and lots of them.
8. Clean fresh water to drink.
9.Music!
10. Pretty things to surround myself with.

Now go visit Cori. She's one of my newest blogger buddies and
is a fellow Canadian too!

Are you up to anything exciting today??
I'm going to be taking Miss Thing to the walk in clinic.
She has another UTI. This time it's worse. There's blood in
her urine. I'm hoping the clinic is open. If not then it's the ER
for us. We have a major shortage of doctors here(we don't have
one) and people go to the ER for things other than broken limbs,
heart attacks and gushing wounds all the time BUT I know I'll feel
like an idiot if I have to take her there. That's just a throwback to another
time though. Taking her and feeling like a goofball is waaay better
than kidney damage!
She was given some bubble stuff from Grandma and Grandpa
and I completely forgot she wasn't supposed to have bubble baths.
Bingo Bango the next day she had a UTI. It was that quick.
She's loving the copious amounts of cranberry juice though,lol.
Ok,gotta run. My workout awaits!

Hello 2007!

I was going to write a year in review post and
I had almost completed it when I stopped and
changed my mind.
Why?
I sure had lot of material for a decent retrospective
but most of was negative. Sure good things happened
to me,but the ones that stood out were all bad.
I didn't feel good or right to bring any more attention
to those bad things and I decided to leave them firmly where
they belong.
The past.
2007 is the year where I look forward.

2007 is also the year where my luck is going
to be wonderful. 7 is my lucky number,haha!
I was positively giddy the eve before as I sat
here with my family,drinking my Bailey's,enjoying
the kids and all the excitment.
I felt such great anticipation and now that 2007
is here,I feel it even more.
I'm not exactly sure what I think is going to happen
but I know whatever it is,it's going to be great.
I just know it,I can feel it in my bones.
Am I crazy? I feel crazy,but sure...lol.

This year I have a few goals I'd like to accomplish.
Tons of little things.
I could ramble on and on about a zillion of them but
I also have two big goals. I am finally going to conquer two
things I've feared and have been putting off for years and years.
I can't tell you what they are though.
Less talk more action. That's my motto this year.
I know if I tell anybody(my family included) I won't succeed
so I'm zippin' my lip!
You can take a guess if you'd like.
It'd be fun to see what you guys come up with!
I'll tell you if you're right of course when I accomplish them:)

Doesn't it feel good to be in a NEW year??
I love this time. Everything is fresh and new.
Spring is just around the corner,we've got new holidays
and occasions to celebrate,new things to experience....
I'm thrilled to pieces:)

I hope you all had a wonderful New Years and that the year
to come is just as incredible!